I am so, so sorry to have missed this. So much for alerts when anyone replies to your thread!
I started this several years and at least two usernames ago, and haven't worked on my family tree in ages.
I was really moved by your message and would love to get in touch if you are still interested and I'm not too late to be of use to you and your mother-in-law.
If you see this message, please e-mail me at genvic at gmx.co.uk.